I've asked almost everyone I know this one particular question since I first arrived in Vietnam...and every single time, I've received a different answer:
"So, uhhh, when does it start to get cooler in Vietnam?"
I normally have to repeat this question at LEAST three times - my accent is still indecipherable to most. And everyone usually cocks their head to one side and looks at me as though I've just asked them for the answer to world peace.
Some answers I've received:
Response A: "Oh, it get nice in November...just like Spring in New York faw you!"
Response B: "Oh, more like December and January, it nice to travel faw you."
Response C: "Umm, I not really sure. What do you mean by 'nice', Teacha Kelly...?"
Response A came from the opinion of someone who has never been to New York (let alone outside of Vietnam, ever) so I ruled it out immediately. Response B - that person, just like Response A, also has zero flight mileage under their belt. So I crossed that solution off the list too. And Response C, well...let's just say I never got an answer because she changed the topic rather quickly, undeniably nervous to break the bad news to me...
So yesterday, when I locked myself out of my own bedroom and had to have a locksmith come to the house and work his magic, I asked the translator who came along with him what the dealio was with this damn weather:
"So, uhhh, when does it start to get cooler in Can Tho?!"
His mouth hung open, observing how sweaty I was even though it was obvious I had gotten out of the shower only moments ago, my hair still dripping wet. Probably feeling sorry for me and realizing that no one had given me a straightforward answer yet, he said this:
"Uhhh, it doesn't."
This was followed by a shoulder shrug and a nervous giggle.
Never before has the truth hurt so much...